Thursday, March 11, 2010

there is no tomorrow......







had a friend come over back on drugs trying sell me all kinds of shit. made my soul hurt, i gave him ten dollars for a rooster bell and old barn door, which i will do a painting of what drugs and alcohol made my soul feel like towards the ends. i am free now though. he is not. i gave him ten dollars to buy some more chains, and told him his light was out and that i loved him. he is a good guy when he is sober. i used to be fucked up on lots of shit so i hold no judgement only prayers now. maybe he will stop maybe he will die maybe he will just live as his own prisoner...i am free and every day is a gift every breath is gods. i should have been dead myself. but i am not. this is why i feel so alive. mostly the love grows. mostly i hope never to forget were i came from ..and mostly i need a new camera! off to pot, followed by roller derby with my daughter later. carpe diem.

6 comments:

miri said...

Powerful post Jeff. Caught me by surprise, having just read a bunch of typical 'fluff' blogging. And beautiful deep painting too. That first piece is haunting.
Miri

cindy shake said...

No wonder your art is so deep -your life experiences, so far, have given you meaning and art has given you a wonderful vehicle to express and share it. We had a friend who was in and out of rehab for a nasty meth (and other stuff) addiction (his parents paid for it after we'd go pick him up from drug & homeless areas in town) but was never able to pull out of the spiral. We felt helpless and yet fearful when he came to our house a few years later out of nowhere -STILL alive but looking for something to steal...

cookingwithgas said...

great post and as you know he has to want to help himself.
It's hard to watch- keep doing your art!
And taking good care of your family!

www.jeffmartinceramics.blogspot.com said...

thanks, yes i do hope he is awakened.

prin said...

Between rock and a hard place?

Sorry, probably not the time for puns.

Yours seems a situation where there are only wrong answers and helplessness. :(

*hugs*

jim gottuso said...

amazing post jeff... glad you're back and what could be better than roller derby with your daughter. carpe diem indeed. sorry to see your platters only made 2 or 5 but the up side is one sold already. i used to spread sand under big or heavy pots or tiles so they wouldn't catch on the shelves. i apologize if you're already doing this. the two that shattered don't look like that was the issue though. are you in electric kiln? i have a drying profile that i use when i'm not sure the water's all out. of course it would be difficult without the computer controller but it works. my profile holds the kiln at 190 for about 2 hours, then just let her rip.